Monday 23 June 1986

…Back to school.
Did SMP and comprehension.
Did some more World Cup reports.
Did a choir and recorder practice for the school’s musical evening next Monday.
Wimbledon began again with………

And here, right on cue, is the very comprehension exercise (Test 14, to be precise) I did at school 25 years ago today:

No, the horn will not be blown three times
From the answers I have given, the exercise seemed to have been about some sort of Celtic legend or Scottish fable involving the sounding of a horn two times (not three – oops!), men raising themselves on their elbows, horses champing their bits and the arising of “a great crisis”.

You’ll see I was the unlucky beneficiary of one of those most wretched of all classroom cruelties: when a teacher initially ticks one of your answers, then changes their mind and over-writes it with an extra-heavy cross.

Adjacent to this in my English workbook is the following. It seems to be an attempt at an original fairy tale, replete with the sort of abrupt resolution that would make Russell T Davies proud:

It was a, ahem, privilege to share that with you.

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